I Am Disabled And My Husband Wants A Divorce: 9 Things To Do

I am disabled and my husband wants a divorce.” My school friend Naira Devos also told me, “Approximately three months ago, I was in an accident that left me wheelchair-bound. After that incident, I found my husband not loving me anymore. And, now, he wants a divorce.”

Divorce is difficult at any point in life, but when you’re disabled, it can be even more complicated. While there are no easy answers, here are nine tips to help you navigate the process with as much strength and dignity as possible.

Can a husband divorce his wife if she is disabled?

There are no prohibitive state laws that one can’t divorce their disabled spouse, but the only cause of disabled or no-fault divorce is bad. So, a husband can divorce his wife if she is disabled somehow. But all the legal consequences must be considered.

Also, suppose the disability prevents the woman from fulfilling her marital duties, such as being able to have sex. In that case, the husband may be able to obtain a divorce on the grounds of marital breakdown, i.e., the irretrievable breakdown of the marriage.

Moreover, if it’s a mental disability, here the husband can also seek a divorce on the grounds of mental cruelty, i.e., if his wife’s behavior has caused him excessive stress and suffering. Divorcing when your spouse is disabled is not a good thing in the moral sense.

No matter the husband’s feelings, he cannot leave his disabled wife. Instead, he must go through the correct channels and dissolve the marriage via divorce proceedings. Here, the wife will get alimony from her husband. If this is your case, you better consult a divorce attorney for a disabled person.

Ultimately, it is up to the courts to decide whether or not a husband can divorce his wife if she is disabled. In most cases, however, the answer will be no.

i am disabled and my husband wants a divorce

I am Disabled and My Husband Wants a Divorce: 9 Things to Do

#1. Communicate to your husband:

First, you should tell your husband that you are unhappy with the divorce. This can be done through a lawyer or in person if possible.

Make sure you state your feelings and let him know that you want to try and work things out. If he still wants a divorce, ensure that you negotiate fair issues in the divorce agreement.

#2. Get an attorney:

If your husband is totally decided to end the marriage, it’s time to get an attorney. This is important because you will need someone to help you navigate the legal process and protect your rights in child custody, property division, alimony, or spousal support.

Also, a lawyer can help you understand the laws governing disability and divorce in your state. Even you may find divorce attorneys for disabled persons in your local area.

#3. Organize your paperwork:

The next step is to organize your paperwork, i.e., collect all the documents related to your marriage, finances, and disability. This will help ensure that the facts are clear and that you get all the important details.

Organizing paperwork will also make it easier for your lawyer to review the documents and advise you accordingly.

#4. Make a plan:

Now it’s time to make a plan. You should figure out your financial needs and how much you need for future medical expenses. Creating a budget to help you manage your finances after the divorce is finalized is also important.

You can discuss these things with your lawyer and devise a plan that will work for you. And you should also know can your husband divorce without you knowing.

#5. Seek support:

Seek out support from family and friends during this difficult time. This support can help you emotionally and mentally deal with the divorce process. You can also look for support groups and counseling services specifically designed for people with disabilities.

Moreover, suppose you are insured with SSDI (Social Security Disability Insurance) or SSI (Supplemental Security Income). In that case, you may be eligible to receive financial benefits to ease the money-related strain of a divorce.

#6. Consider your children:

Make sure you consider the divorce’s impact on any children you have. You can talk to them about what’s happening and work with them to ensure their needs are taken care of. If needed, consult a mental health professional for additional support.

Also, consider how your disability may impact your ability to care for your children and how you can get help from family or friends when needed.

#7. Protect your assets:

Dividing assets in a divorce can be difficult, especially if you have a disability. So, protect your financial and medical interests by asking for what you need from the divorce settlement.

For example, ensure that alimony or spousal support payments are adequate enough to cover your medical expenses and other needs.

Also, if you receive disability benefits, ask for a portion of your former spouse’s retirement savings or income as part of the settlement.

#8. Explore alternatives to divorce:

If possible, try to explore alternatives to divorce, such as mediation or counseling. This can help you and your husband agree about the issues in your marriage and avoid going through a lengthy and costly court process.

If these alternatives don’t work, you must prepare for a traditional divorce proceeding.

#9. Take care of yourself:

Finally, you should take care of yourself during this stressful time. Make sure you are getting enough rest and taking steps to reduce stress. Also, you have to know how to divorce someone you love.

You should also take time for yourself to do things that will make you feel better, such as reading, spending time with friends, or doing a hobby.

Factors to consider when divorcing a spouse with a disability

Financial stability:

Divorce is a financial decision as well as an emotional one, and people with disabilities often have unique income needs that must be taken into consideration to ensure financial stability post-divorce. It may be helpful to draft a budget and evaluate the spouse’s disability benefits before making any decisions.

Access to medical care:

When divorcing a spouse with a disability, it is essential to consider how their access to medical care may be impacted. If the disabled spouse has private healthcare insurance through the other spouse’s employer, that coverage could end as part of the divorce settlement. It may also be necessary to make provisions for the payment of medical bills and the continuation of medical coverage.

Child custody:

Depending on the severity of a spouse’s disability, it may be necessary to consider what type of custodial arrangement would best serve any children involved in the divorce. If one parent has a disability that affects their ability to care for young children, the court may grant custody to the other parent.

Living arrangements:

Finally, moving out of a shared home can be challenging when one spouse is disabled. It is essential to create clear plans and expectations about who will move out and how expenses related to the move will be handled. It may also be necessary to discuss any changes to living arrangements for children or elderly family members.

To learn more about how Divorcing a disabled spouse, watch the below video:

FAQs on I am Disabled and My Husband Wants a Divorce

What is considered abandonment in a marriage in Arkansas?

In Arkansas, abandonment is defined as one spouse leaving the marital home without the intention of returning. This can occur for various reasons, such as work commitments or financial difficulties.

One criminal form of marital abandonment is when a spouse leaves their family without any explanation, communicates an intention to divorce, or provides for them financially. If a dependent spouse or child becomes sick or underage, the other spouse has a legal obligation to take care of them and cannot leave..

Once this has been done, the abandoned spouse has 30 days to respond. If they do not respond within this timeframe, the divorce will be granted, and the abandoned spouse will be required to pay alimony. In some cases, the abandoned spouse may also be required to pay child support.

Can you receive disability and alimony at the same time?

For many people going through a divorce, spousal support is an essential source of income. However, what happens if the person receiving support becomes disabled? Can they continue to receive alimony payments?

The answer depends on the specific circumstances of the case. If the disability is temporary and the person is expected to recover, they may continue receiving alimony payments.

However, if the disability is permanent, the court may modify or terminate the alimony award. In making its decision, the court will consider factors such as the severity of the disability and the financial impact on both parties.

Moreover, in the case of SSDI, the Social Security benefit could be lost if the alimony payment is large enough. The Social Security Administration counts alimony as unearned income, which reduces an individual’s SSI benefit. If you pay $400 in alimony to your ex-spouse every month, that amount will likely come out of their SSI check.

As a result, each case is unique. Consulting with an experienced attorney is always advised to understand your rights and options.

What happens if you divorce a disabled spouse in California?

In the case of divorcing a disabled spouse in California, there are a few things that you should be aware of.

First, if your spouse receives disability benefits from the government, those benefits will likely stop.

Additionally, if you have been providing care for your spouse, you may no longer be eligible for reimbursement under the Cal-Care program. Finally, if you have joint ownership of any property, such as a home or car, you must agree with your spouse on how to divide the property.

While divorce can be difficult under any circumstances, be prepared for the challenges of divorcing a disabled spouse.

Can I get alimony if my husband is on disability?

Although every case is different, in general, if your husband is receiving disability benefits, it is unlikely that you will be able to receive alimony from him. This is because disability benefits are typically considered his sole income source.

However, there are some circumstances in which you may be able to receive alimony, such as if your husband has other sources of income or if he can work part-time despite his disability.

If you are seeking alimony from your husband, consult with an experienced family law attorney who can assess your specific situation and advise you of your options.

How to deal with a disabled spouse?

It can be difficult to deal with a disabled spouse. You may feel like you must take on all the household duties and provide constant care and support. However, remember that you are not alone.

There are many resources available to help you manage your caregiver responsibilities. Here are some tips for dealing with a disabled spouse:

-Talk to your spouse about your caregiving responsibilities. Discuss what tasks you are comfortable with and what tasks you would prefer to delegate to someone else.

-Identify your support network. This may include friends, family members, or professional caregivers. Lean on them for help when you need it.

-Take care of yourself. Remember to schedule time for activities that make you happy, such as reading, going for walks, or spending time with friends. Don’t hesitate to contact a therapist or counselor if you feel overwhelmed.

Remember, it’s okay to ask for help when you’re caring for a disabled spouse. You can make the experience more manageable and enjoyable with the right support system.

Should you end a relationship with a disabled spouse?

The decision to end a relationship with a disabled spouse should be made based on the individual circumstances of each situation. 

On the one hand, you may feel a deep loyalty and love for your spouse. On the other hand, you may feel overwhelmed by the challenges of caring for someone with special needs.

Both parties in the relationship need to consider their needs and work together to find an amicable solution that works best for them. If communication has broken down or either party feels unsafe, it may be best to end the relationship. 

If you’re struggling to make a decision, it may be helpful to speak with a counselor that can you refuse divorce or a therapist who can help you explore your options.


Divorce is never easy and can be especially difficult if you are disabled. However, if your husband wants a divorce, there are steps that you can take to make sure that your rights and interests are protected.

Following the tips outlined above, you can prepare for a court proceeding and hopefully come out of it with a fair settlement. Remember to take care of yourself while going through this process and seek out support when needed. Good luck!

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