Why My Ex Messaged My Best Friend: 5 Probable Reasons

Why my ex messaged my best friend? It can be a confusing and painful experience when your ex starts messaging your best friend. You may be wondering why they would do such a thing. There could be any number of reasons, but here are five of the most probable ones.

My Ex Messaged My Best Friend

Why does it bother you that your ex is texting your friend?

As you are searching for the answer to the question, “Why is my ex messaging to my best friend”, I have a question for you.

Why does it bother you? Is it because you are still in love with your ex and want them back? If that’s the case, you need to take a step back and consider what you want.

What is the big deal if you don’t have a relationship with your ex? If you have no connection with your ex and don’t want one, why bother you that they are texting your best friend? I think it is none of your business.

It is their life, and they can live it how they want. Just let it go and move on with your life. But, if you need to know the answer just for curiosity, read on.

Why My Ex Messaged My Best Friend: 5 Probable Reasons

Here are the five probable reasons why your ex is texting your best friend:

#1. They are trying to get your attention:

One of the most common reasons why an ex would message a best friend is because they are trying to get the former’s attention. They may want to reignite the flame between the two of you, or they may simply like to remind you that they exist.

In any case, if your ex is messaging your best friend just to get your attention, then it’s best to ignore them. Don’t give them the satisfaction of knowing they still have a hold on you.

#2. Your ex is trying to stir the pot:

Another possibility is that your ex is trying to stir the pot and create drama in your life. They may be hoping you will get jealous or angry when you find out they are messaging your best friend.

Is your ex a girl, and did you cheat on her? This can be their way of getting revenge on you for something. Research shows that girls are more revenge prone than men.

People often do this when they are feeling hurt or upset. If your ex is trying to cause drama in your life, it’s best just to stay away from them. Your past relationship should stay in the past. Please don’t give them the power to control your emotions.

#3. Maybe they’re friends:

It’s also possible that your ex and best friend are friends. They may have become close while you were still together or after you broke up.

If this is the case, there’s nothing to worry about. Just be happy that your ex has found someone they can talk to and confide in.

If your ex is friends with your best friend, then you should be happy for them. This is a good thing, and it means that they can move on from the relationship. Just be sure to respect their friendship and don’t try to interfere.

#4. To bang your friend:

One of the most hurtful reasons an ex would message a best friend is if they want to sleep with them. This is often referred to as “friend-banging”, and it’s a pretty low thing to do.

If your ex tries to friend-bang your bestie, they are not over you. They are using your friend as a way to get close to you and make you jealous. This is not a good sign, and it’s best to stay away from both.

Your ex may also try to sleep with your friends because they are attractive. If this is the case, there’s nothing you can do about it. Just know it has nothing to do with you and try to move on.

#5. Because they are free to love: 

The final reason why an ex would message a best friend is because they are free to love. They may have moved on from the relationship and may be ready to date someone new. If this is the case, then you should be happy for them.

Because your EX and your friend are adult people who do not need your permission to interact. You may feel uncomfortable about it, but if they are happy, that is all that matters. Just let them be and focus on your own life.

You may hate your ex for sending texts to your best friend or for making a relationship with him. But, this is their life, and you can’t control that.

Just because your ex is moving on doesn’t mean you have to either. You can take your time and focus on yourself. Don’t feel you need to rush into a new relationship just because they are.

What will be your feelings if you know that your best friend is dating your ex? Jealous or pathetic? Listen to the discussion of Christine Addae:

FAQs on My Ex Messaged My Best Friend

Why is my ex talking to my best friend?

Maybe they’re just trying to stay in your life indirectly, or they might be hoping to use your friend as a way to get back in touch with you. Or, it could be that they’re simply trying to get under your skin and make you jealous.

If you’re unsure how to deal with the situation, take a deep breath and think about your best strategy. And remember, you can always talk to your best friend about it too – they might have some insight you didn’t consider.

Is it okay for your best friend to talk to your ex?

It depends on the situation and the relationship between you, your best friend, and your ex. If you’re still harbouring feelings for your ex, it’s probably not a good idea for your best friend to talk to them.

This could end up causing hurt feelings and tension between you and your best friend. Be thankful that your ex is not trying to ruin your life but just talking with your best friend.

However, if you’re over your ex and confident that your friendship is strong enough to withstand any potential drama, then there’s no harm in allowing them to talk.

Is it OK if your best friend is friends with your ex?

There’s no correct answer to this question because it depends on your situation and relationship with your ex.

If you’re still friends with your ex and you’re comfortable with them being friends with your best friend, then there’s no reason why it wouldn’t be OK.

However, it’s probably not a good idea if you’re not on good terms with your ex or you’re not comfortable with them being around your best friend.

How to get out of the friend zone with your ex-boyfriend?

You just need to ignore them. It is not easy, but it is the only way to get out of the friend zone. Just don’t answer their texts, calls or any type of communication. And if you happen to see them in person, just act like you don’t know them. It’s harsh, but it works like a charm. 

Should you be friends with your ex?

Why not? If you’re able to be friends with your ex, it’s probably a good sign that you’ve moved on from the relationship. Being friends with your ex can also be helpful if you have to see them often because of mutual friends or shared interests.

Of course, there are some exceptions to this rule. If you’re not over your ex or still have feelings for them, then being friends with them is probably not a good idea. And if your ex was abusive or toxic in any way, it’s best to stay away from them entirely.


There are various reasons why an ex would message a best friend. Some of these reasons are harmless, while others can be hurtful. Just remember that you don’t have to do anything you don’t want to and that you can permanently block them if you need to.

If your ex is messaging your best friend, stay calm and focus on your life. Don’t let them control your emotions or dictate how you live your life. Just be happy for them if they have moved on and focus on yourself.

About Shakir Ahmed

Head of the editorial team. I hold a Bachelor of Laws (LL.B) from UoL. Written hundreds of articles on divorce, child custody, employment and other human rights law topics for blogs and websites worldwide. Worked 6 years as a relationship development trainer. For any communication regarding any legal matter, please feel free to email me at shakir@lawyersnlaws.com

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