Are you in a situation where you are bound to say, “I don’t trust my child’s father“? If you don’t trust your child’s father, it can be a difficult decision on what to do next. You might be worried about maintaining co-parenting with him. You need to protect your child, and yourself, from harm.
In this post, I will discuss some of the options that are available to you. We will also talk about the importance of seeking legal help if you need it.
I Don’t Trust My Child’s Father: 5 Things You Can Do
As a single mother, I’ve struggled to trust my son’s father. We divorced because he had fathered another child outside of marriage, which was hidden from me. As a biological father, he has the right to visitation.
But he is such a large part of my son’s life, and I want to ensure he is safe. I also don’t want him to be around negative influences. I have full custody, but I still need to co-parent with his father. What can I do?
That is the story of one of my cousins. As any parent knows, raising a child is a tremendous responsibility. Not only do you have to provide for their physical needs, but you also have to nurture their emotional and mental development.
And while it’s important to have a partner you can rely on, there are times when you may find yourself in a situation where you don’t trust your child’s father. If that’s the case, here are five things you can do:
#1. Find out the reason:
Why don’t you trust your child’s father? Is it because of something he has done in the past? If so, what is it that he did? Was it a one-time thing, or is it something that he has been doing for a while?
If you can’t figure out why you don’t trust him, it might be helpful to talk to someone else about it. Sometimes it’s helpful to get an objective opinion. If you know why you don’t trust him, you can take steps to protect yourself and your child.
If it is because he’s done anything that amounts to abuse of you or your child, then you should take steps to protect yourself and your child from him. You can get a restraining order if he’s done anything that makes you feel like you or your child are in danger.
You also need to think about whether or not the reason why you don’t trust him is something that can be overcome. If it’s something like he’s been lying to you, then maybe there’s a chance that he’ll change, and you can learn to trust him again.
#2. Calmly talk with him:
As you have to maintain a co-parenting relationship for your child’s betterment, you can talk with him about your concerns. You should try to be as calm as possible when talking to him.
If he’s done something that has made you lose trust in him, then you need to tell him what he did and why it made you lose trust in him. He needs to know how his actions have affected you.
You also need to tell him what you expect from him if you continue co-parenting with him. He needs to know that he needs to be honest with you and make an effort to rebuild your trust.
If he’s willing to talk to you about your concerns and work on rebuilding your trust, you can continue co-parenting with him. But if he’s not willing to talk to you about your concerns or try to rebuild your trust, then you need to take steps to protect yourself and your child.
#3. Get a restraining order:
If it is a personal issue and there is no child custody involved here, then you can take action by getting a restraining order if he’s done anything that makes you feel like you are in danger. A restraining order is not a criminal punishment. It’s simply an order from the court that requires him to stay away from you.
If he violates the restraining order, then he can be arrested. But even if he doesn’t violate the restraining order, it will still be in effect, and you can use it to help protect yourself from him.
Getting a restraining order is a serious step, and it’s not something that you should do lightly. But if you feel like you’re in danger, then it’s a step that you need to take to protect yourself.
If you have any concerns about your safety, you should also talk to your local police department. They can help you assess the situation and decide if a restraining order is right for you.
#4. File to modify custody order:
If there is a custody order in place, you can file to modify the custody order if you feel like your child is in danger. You need to go to court and show the judge why you think the custody arrangement should be changed. You also need to show that your child is in danger if he continues to have contact with his father.
If the judge agrees, he will modify the custody order. This will require his father to have supervised visitation with your child or no contact at all. This is a serious step, but it’s one that you need to take if you feel like your child is in danger.
Family courts normally don’t want to deprive a child of a relationship with both his parents. But if you can show that your child is in danger, the court will take measures to protect your child.
You should also talk to a lawyer before you go to court. They can help you prepare your case and ensure you have all the evidence you need to convince the judge to modify the custody order.
#5. Don’t alienate your child:
“I kicked my baby daddy out from the life of my child.”
No, you shouldn’t do that. Even if you have a good reason not to trust his father, you shouldn’t try to alienate your child from him. Your child has a right to have a relationship with both his parents. And even though you may not trust his father, your child loves him, and he’s still an important part of your child’s life.
If you try alienating your child from his father, it will only backfire. It will damage your relationship with your child and make it harder for you to co-parent with his father.
What more can you do if you don’t trust your husband/ex? Watch the below video to learn more:
FAQs on I Don’t Trust My Child’s Father
How do you co parent with someone you don’t trust?
To effectively co-parent with someone you don’t trust, it is important to establish clear boundaries and expectations. You should also keep communication open, honest, and respectful. Be flexible and willing to compromise when necessary. Taking these steps can help create a more positive and productive parenting relationship, even if there is a lack of trust.
What is a toxic dad like?
A toxic dad is someone who is harmful to their children, either emotionally or physically. They may be overly critical, constantly put their children down, or withhold love and affection.
They may also be physically abusive, hitting, kicking, or hurting their children. Toxic dads can also verbally abuse, using words to hurt and control their children. They may try to alienate the child from the other parent.
How important is a father in a child’s life?
A father is a very important figure in a child’s life. He can provide love, support, and guidance to his children. He can also be a positive role model for them. A father’s involvement in his child’s life has been shown to positively affect their academic performance, self-esteem, and overall well-being.
How to deal with a father who doesn’t want to be a father?
Talk to him about your feelings and see if he’s willing to open up about his own. Reassure him that you’re there for him and willing to help with the parenting responsibilities.
Suggest counseling or therapy help him deal with his feelings about fatherhood. Give him some space and time to come to terms with his decision. Ultimately, only he can decide whether or not he wants to be a father. But if you’re patient and supportive, you may be able to help him come to terms with it.
How do you tell if you are co-parenting with a narcissist?
One way to tell is by looking at how your partner interacts with your child. If your partner is always trying to be the centre of attention and belittles or criticizes your child, they may be narcissistic. Another way to tell is by looking at how your partner responds to conflict.
If your partner is always trying to win arguments and refuses to compromise, they may be narcissistic. Finally, if your partner is always putting their own needs above the needs of your child, then they may be a narcissist.
Co-parenting with narcissists is hard as divorcing a narcissistic spouse. So, you have to take every step carefully to keep a good relationship with them for the sake of your child.
Conclusion:
If you don’t trust your child’s father, you must take steps to protect yourself and your child. You can get a restraining order, file to modify the custody order, or take other measures to protect yourself. But you shouldn’t try to alienate your child from his father. Doing so will only backfire and damage your relationship with your child.